Kids are often taught: "It's not whether you win or lose; it's how you play the game."  As everyone knows, that's usually said to the game's losers.

But here's a question: does it apply to the winners, as well?

I just read about a girls' school that trounced its opponent 100-0 in a recent basketball game.  The losing side was a school of 20 girls who struggle "with 'learning differences,' such as short attention spans or dyslexia."

Clearly, there are two views here.  On the one hand, kids need to learn that everyone can't always win.  On the other hand, kids need help in developing self-esteem.

As you can imagine, the decisive win was impressive.  But how more impressive would it have been if the winning team (after leading by more than 50 points at half-time) had offered to end the game early?  (Kudos, by the way, to the losing team, for not walking away.)

I often say: it's not just the message, but the manner in which it's communicated.  The winners' reputation is that of success and strength.  However, are they the kids you want your kids hanging out with?  Had they been more thoughtful in their "message delivery" their reputation would be that of winners in many more ways than just one.